Do You Ever Wonder...?

Do you ever wonder why some of the people that you care so much for can change so much...

Do you ever wonder why some things that you're familiar with could one day suddenly become something so strange that you wondered if you imagined the familiarity and knowledge you have of it in the first place...

Do you ever wonder where time has gone when it seems like just yesterday when the first that stared back at you was of a young girl and now you can see lines emerging on the face that looks right back at you in the harsh light of the day....

Do you ever wonder how you got here..

And feel worried and even a little sad about what big surprises await you in the future that you have little control of.

Man vs. Woman

I've been with the gym for 3 months now, and have had about 14 sessions with that personal trainer of mine. So far I've lost four kilos, and my jeans are looser around the tummy.

Before you say "Hey that's great!" or "Wow, good on you!".. let me just highlight a typical day at the gym, and a typical day of training.

On a training day, I get to the gym at 10.40 a.m. I usually have breakfast at home, at 9 a.m. so that by 10.40, the food's gone down nicely. As soon as A sees me (A is my trainer), he'd say; "Fifteen minutes!" or "Twenty minutes".. which basically means that's how long I have to be on the cross-trainer or the elliptical machine (using a fat-burning program setting that leaves your legs feeling like jelly and your thighs burning like on fire). Then when I'm done with the "warm-up" part (yes that's just the warm-up), A would start me on a circuit training program, or sometimes we'd make our rounds and work the machines. If the day's training involves circuit training, a typical session would involve approximately 200 lunges, 100 squads, 100 tricep curls of some sort (don't ask me the names of the motions coz I don't know), 100 bicep curls/exercises of some sort, 100 shoulder-strengthening exercises, 100 lower back exercises, 50 upper back-strengthening exercises (usually we do the "seated rowing" for this with weighs up to 20 kilos), 100 pulley-exercises, 100 reverse crunches, intervals on the step-thingy (where you go up the step and kick or simply jog up and down the step in a hurry).. and many many other exercises that the forever pleasant-but-sadistic A could squeeze into our one-hour session. And A, being the hardworker (right!) that he is, would gladly extend the session to nearly 2 hrs if there's no client waiting after me. And after the session is over, it's back onto the elliptical or the cross-trainer again for another 20 to 30 minutes of fatburning cardio.

On a non-training day, I'd come in at about 11.00 a.m., do 20 minutes of fatburning cardio, and then spend about 40 minutes to an hour working the machines and doing lunges, squats, crunches and weights. Then it's back for another 20 minutes on the cardio machines before rushing off to shower and fetch Gibran from school at 1 p.m.

Every week I'll have two days of personal training, and three days of independent trainer-free workouts (either at the gym of at home on my own elliptical, and using H's gym equipment).

So let me get this straight...

For the amount of work that I put in every week, I really want to see a bigger number than FOUR KILOS.

Just look at the biggest loser and the kilos that fly every week!

Oh well. A girl can dream, right?!

Now lets talk about H.

He works out 5 to 6 days a week about one hour each time, using some workout programs he downloads from the Internet..

And he's already tight and taught from muscles all over in places one can think of. His abs only has a thin layer of fat left amidst those ketul-ketulan of stomach muscles, his arms do not have even an ounce of fat left, and his face looks thin to the point of being gaunt. Oh, and his body fat is more than 10% less than mine.

Blame it on the genetic differences and the biologies of man versus woman.

But really.

How unfair can life be?!

Changes in My Comfort Zone

Did you hear about Jusco One Utama closing down soon?

Dang. That shop's been there since OU first opened back when I was 16 years old. Perhaps 60% of everything that I have in the pantry (and in my closet) comes from there.

Did you know that Marks n Spencers' things are now more affordable than many departmental brands?

And yet the staff still act high and mighty as though you're buying a highly rare and prestigious brand. That's alright coz now that I'm older I just take my business elsewhere if a certain store's staff irritate me in any small way.

Did you know that I've owned Coach, Nine West and Liz Claiborne and I frankly feel as if they all wear out in the same ways that good quality handbags should?

Thus I don't idolise any particular brand out of those three, and to this day I don't understand why Coach OU staff act as if their noses are constantly hung in the air and would tag around smilingly when we go in wearing our LVs and Aigners, but would treat us like mites if we happened to be wearing our Liz or Charles and Keith bags. And to think Coach only costs so little when you buy em at US outlet stores anyway. So what's with these so-calledly prestigous shops layan-ing only datin-look-alikes?

I've always been a small-time-shopaholic and I don't like the way things are changing in my shops.

I hear Isetan's taking over Jusco in One Utama.

Oh no.

Give me good ol' Jusco any day.

There must be a point to this story...?

Take pity on me. I'm just a simple girl who loves my neighbourhood Jusco shop where the surroundings are as familiar as my old socks and the sour-faced staff don't bother me at all coz they don't judge me by the way I look on my bad-attire day.

The Mummy Group

After three years, I finally made some Mummy friends. Don't get me wrong, I do have friends who have babies, but we hardly ever see each other and lets face it, sometimes people just draw apart. The reality is that most of my closest friends aren't Mummies just yet. Not that I'm complaining coz they are always soo kind towards Gibran, but it's nice to have Mummy pals too :)

Being a SAHM is not all roses. Sometimes you feel quite alone.

It's just nice to know that there are others who feel the same way too.

We talk about cooking, cleaning, and all those boring stuff that takes up 24 hours of our time. We talk about hangnails and rough hands that handle abrasive detergents and are in need of some tender loving care. We talk about our kids and how they are so alike and so different. We talk about how fat our tummies are and how we never (ever) have time to ourselves even for 15 minutes of exercise a day. We talk about forgotten dreams and sacrificed ambitions that have been laid to rest, albeit perhaps restlessly. We talk about all sorts of junks that would bore a typical woman, just because we need some other house-wife soul to talk to.

Sometimes we sit down for a short chat after the kids go into class in the mornings. Then some of us would go home and finish the morning's chores. Sometimes we get together for breakfast and talk and talk, until the morning's chores were left undone and piled up just waiting at the doorstep when we reach home later. Sometimes we say lets forget those silly housechores and lets go shopping and spend some money just because we deserve it, dammit.

Some friendships you just hope they'll last.

Amen.

Side by Side

While at Mum's Place weeks ago (yes, another Mum's Place moment), we were held captivated by a rare moment in time..


KJ and RPK side by side, y'all!

Now all that's left for a girl to wish for is World Peace.

Hehhhhh..

The Biggest Loser Year

My friend and I are gung-ho on losing weight this year. Watching The Biggest Loser Asia is motivating indeed.

Want to hear my progress?

Lets see...

I've been exercising at least 4 to 5 times a week for 30 minutes each time (yes that's all the time I can spare in a day amidst the housework and unending errands of being on the job 24/7).. and..

I've lost ONE inch around the waist, and ONE inch around the bum.

Woopee.

Hmff.

The Silent Fart

While dining at Mum's Place a couple of weeks back, I saw this sign on display..


Hah!

Let me just say that I agree with the "nobody ever notices who did it" part but.. the feeling good part...

Maybe it should say "nobody ever notices who did it but it stinks anyway."

Or to be more precise, in my opinion.. "... it stinks and it feels good." Now, that's accurate!

The Honda

A couple of weeks back we finally got the Honda back from the workshop where it's been for the past 3 and a half months. Yesss. Can you believe that the wrecked Honda took 3 months to repair and all insurance papers cleared. Total repairs came up to more than 9k.

All I can say is I'm glad that the wreck was the Honda, and not the man who was inside it. Alhamdulillah, syukur.

Now the next issue to deal with is whether we'd be keeping the Honda or letting it go for a new car. It rattles when driven fast now :(


From left; Gibran's ride, H's ride and my ride. Together again ;p

A Good Day

I thought turning 31 would be as little fun as turning 30. For the sake of my very good and caring friends I'll say that the highlight of turning 30 was when they surprised me with a high fiber cheesecake for me to have all to myself because not one of them actually liked the high fiber cheesecake.. well, accept for me, of course. So yes, I appreciated the cheesecake :)

Yesterday night as I was feeling sorry for myself and thinking about the countless ambitions and dreams that I thought I'd lived through at the coming of age 31 (un-materialised dreams of course), the sweet man that I married came to sit with me even though he had lectures to give early in the morning. When he asked me what was bothering me most, and I said that I have so little to show for right now, he'd proceeded to list all the things that I've got to show for. Things that I thought he didn't even notice and things that I didn't even notice or think about. He sat with me well through the night as I cleaned, swept, mopped and folded laundry. And I thought.. yes, this'll be a bearable birthday after all.

Then the three women in my family (Mom, Sister and Aunty) took me out for lunch at TGIF and we had a ball. We shopped well into late evening, acting for once as if we were reallyy ladies of leisure. No chores, no errands, no worries. Just chatting and of course chasing after Gibran who got high on too much ice-cream.

The late evening tested me with Gibran who got cranky from tiredness and a nasty sugar crash. For the first time in a longg time I very nearly lose my temper (on a full-blown level!) and threatened him with a clothes hanger. So I thought.. phew. What a birthday this is. Birthdays are just simply crappy as you get older.

Then the girls (my girl pals, that is!) took me out for dinner and my parents volunteered to babysit Gibran. So for the first time in a longgg time since I became a "lady of leisure" (anyone want a severe beating if they dare say this to me again??), I had a girls' night out.

As the day was approaching its end, my long lost estranged best friend (who was my best friend for 24 years) called to with happy birthday and to tell me that she missed me and that there is still hope for our friendship.

And when I got home with a chatty but sleepy Gibran by my side, and H (who had to attend his company's annual dinner tonight) met us with big hugs and smooches to tell us he'd missed us at the dinner and he'd won a water heater in the lucky draw.. I started to wonder if birthdays aren't overrated after all.

Some birthdays can be good. Mine was today :) Thank you, God.

That's the great thing about having a birthday with no expectations whatsoever.

To Do List #1

This is to remind me of things that I deserve to do for myself while Gib's in school. Things that are long distance memories of the past.

1. Go waxing. Better still, go have all unwanted hair permanently removed. Hmm.. that's a thought.

2. Have a much needed-and-desired pedicure. To me nothing's more relaxing than this.

3. Sit back and just relax with a good book. Spiritual readings should be prioritised.

4. Go to the movies alone. A movie of my choice, with popcorns all to myself.

5. Have a proper haircut. The last haircut I had was done by... me. Yes.. shudder.

6. Convince H to take the morning off and go on a date. This coincidentally happened on Wednesday (H had to take MC due to throat infection) and we'd had a breakfast date for the first time in years. I'd even forgotten how fun dates are..! So.. this is a must-do-more.

We'll see how much I'd achieved in a month's time ;)